Q: Aisi ki taisi kab hoti hai?

Q: Aisi ki taisi kab hoti hai?
.........................

Kal kare so aaj kar, aaj kar so ab.

Kal kare so aaj kar, aaj kar so ab. Kal kare so aaj kar, aaj kar so ab. Abey karta hi rahega to dhoyega kab?

Patthar se Dosti, jaan ko khatra.

Patthar se Dosti, jaan ko khatra.
Sardar se Dosti, dimag ko khatra.
Daru se Dosti, Liver ko khatra.
Hum se Dosti, rat be rat SMS ka khatra. Mujhse Dosti Karoge

Agar aap kisi Bus, Train, Plain ya kahi se bhi ja rah

Agar aap kisi Bus, Train, Plain ya kahi se bhi ja rahe ho,
Kisi Ladki/Mahila k hath me phool, dhaga, chain ya chamkti hui koi chij dekhe to turant bhag jaye,
ye chij rakhi ho sakti hai. Aapki jara c laparwahi aapko BHAI bana sakti hai.

1. Nazro ka milna,

1. Nazro ka milna,
2. Sharmana,
3. Ghabrana,
4. Thori si Hasna,
5. Phone no. dena,
6. Miss Call,
7. Sms,
8. Calls,
9. Milna,
10.Proposal....
RESULT : DUS BAHANE KAR K LAGAYE DIL!!

SMS SMS sMs SmS smS sMS SMs dekha

SMS SMS sMs SmS smS sMS SMs dekha Dost maine tujhe kitne sare SMS bheje hai..

Kabhi kabhi mere Dil me khayal aata hai

Kabhi kabhi mere Dil me khayal aata hai
Khuda tere jaise namune kyo banata hai.

Socha tha har mod pe tumhara

Socha tha har mod pe tumhara intezaar karenge, par kambakt sadak hi seedhi nikli

kya Baat hai, Jab Dekho tab Pregnant Hi Rahate

kya Baat hai, Jab Dekho tab Pregnant Hi Rahate Ho Yaar, Jab Bhi Message karta Hu,
Tumhare Delivery Report Aa Jati Hai.

Beta: Pitaji mujhe bandar dikhaona

Beta: Pitaji mujhe bandar dikhaona
Pitaji: Abhi nahi…
Beta: Kyon?
Pitaji: Abhi wo mera SMS dekh raha hoga

Ek sawal...14 Feb. Valentines Day

Ek sawal...14 Feb. Valentines Day ko log aisa kya karte hai ki theek 9 mahinay baad 14 Nov. ko "Children Day" manana padta hai.

Kitne din ho gaye kitne hafte gujar

Kitne din ho gaye kitne hafte gujar gaye baat mahino tak bhi chali gayi ab saal bhi ho jaega ab to kehna mano.....
chalo aise na karo aur jaldi se NAHA LO.....!

Ek baar ek sardar khali kadhai mein

Ek baar ek sardar khali kadhai mein chammach chala raha tha.
Dost ne pucha"Kya bana rahe ho ?"
Sardar:Chutiya bana raha hu...

Close ur eyes n imagine "

Close ur eyes n imagine "Chand ka bed taron ki chadar, phulon ka takiya, aur Pariyon k sapne"
Cum back 2 earth n sleep on ur own khatiya.

Jab dekha unhone tirchi nazar se, khuda ki

Jab dekha unhone tirchi nazar se, khuda ki kasam madhosh ho gaye.
Jab nazar rahi tinchi ki tirch, khade k khade hum behosh ho gaye.

Wife: Mai Maike ja rahi hu, tumhe

Wife: Mai Maike ja rahi hu, tumhe Talak ki Notice bhej dungi!
Husband: Ja ja, Mithi Mithi bate Karke Mujhe khush karne ki koshish mat kar.....

Bandar ka bachcha apni ma se:

Bandar ka bachcha apni ma se: main kitna badsurat hoon. Bandar ki ma: Bhagwaan ka shukar ada karo aur usko dekho jo SMS pad raha hai....

Ek ladki thi dewani si. Mobile

Ek ladki thi dewani si. Mobile lekar chalti thi,
nazre jhuka k, mobile mein kuch karti thi.
Jab bhi milti thi mujhse, yehi pucha karti thi...
Ye Mobile chalu kaise hota hai?

Aap ki life me

Aap ki life me Mithas ho Cadbury jaisi,
raunak ho Nerolac Paint jaisi,
Mahak ho AXE jaisi,
Tazgi ho Colgate jaisi,
aur Tenssion free ho WHISPER jaisi!

Attendence- Pappu Yes Sir

Attendence-
Pappu Yes Sir
Bablu Yes Sir
Tinku Yes Sir
Ullu ?? Ullu ?? Ullu Button dabana band kar, teri baari hai, attendence lagwa.

Santa: Bhai sahab time kya hua? Man:

Santa: Bhai sahab time kya hua? Man: Sham k 6 baje hain! Santa: Sala, subah se pooch raha hoon, sab alag alag time bata rahe hain.

Prince Gadde se nikalne k baad jab Sunni

Prince Gadde se nikalne k baad jab Sunni Deol se mila to Sunni Deol ne usse kaha- "Sorry yaar, ab kabhi HAND PUMP nahi ukhadunga".

Chhota Sardar: Mummy kal raat ko,

Chhota Sardar: Mummy kal raat ko, phir maine bathroom ka darvaja khola toh light apne aap jal gaye.
Mummy: kaminey aaj phir tune fridge mein susu ki!

Lady doctor: tum roz subah clinic k bahar khade

Lady doctor: tum roz subah clinic k bahar khade ho kar aurto(Lady) ko kyon ghurte ho? Santa: ji aap hi ne bahar likha hai "aurton ko dekhne ka samay subah 10 se 12".

Sardar to Girlfriend= Darling main tum

Sardar to Girlfriend= Darling main tum se shaadi nahi karsakta gharwale mana karrahe hai. Girlfriend= Tumhare ghar me kaun kaun hai. Sardar= 1 biwi aur 3 bacche...

Teacher: Now, Children

Teacher:
Now, Children
If I Saw A Man Beating A Donkey
And Stopped Him
What Virtue Would I Be Showing?

Student:
Brotherly Love!

Teacher: Gharebi Ki Had Kya Hai?

Teacher:
Gharebi Ki Had Kya Hai?

Student:
Jab 1 Larki 2 Rupay Main Kiss Dene Ko Tayar Ho
Aur Aap Ke Paas Sirf 1 Rupiya Ho

Teacher: Sach Aur Veham Main Kya Faraq Hai?

Teacher:
Sach Aur Veham Main Kya Faraq Hai?

Student:
Aap Jo Hamein Parha Rahi Hain
Wo Sach Hai.

Ham Parh Rahe Hain
Ye Ap Ka Veham Hai.

Teacher: Jawani Aur

Teacher:
Jawani Aur
Burhape Me Farq Btao…?

Student:
Jawani Me Mobile Me
HASEENO
K Numbers Hote Hain,
Aur Burhape Me
HAKEEMO K

Aik Nursery CLASS Ka Bacha:

Aik Nursery CLASS Ka Bacha:
Ma’am Main Aap Ko Kaisa Lagta Hun?

Madam:
Oh, Very SWEET..

BACHA Apnay Dost Se:
Dekha, Maine Kaha Tha Na Line Marti Hai.

Teacher: Main Ne Subha Ko Khoobsurat Larki Dekh

Teacher:
Main Ne Subha Ko Khoobsurat Larki Dekhi
Iss Ka Future Tense Batao?

Student:
Mai Kal Tak Wo Larki Phassa Loonga

Teachr: Us Bomb Ka Naam Bataiye Jo

Teachr:
Us Bomb Ka Naam Bataiye Jo
Pakistan Ne India Par Phenka
Tha Aur India Ne Usey Pencil
Ki Tarhan Bana Dia?

Students:
Adnan SAMI….

Nafsiat Ka Practical:

Nafsiat Ka Practical:

Professor Ne 1 Choohe K Liye
1 Taraf Cake Or 1 Taraf Choohia Rakhi.

Chooha Foran Cake Ki Taraf Lapka.
Dosri Bar Cake Badal K Roti Rakhi To Chooha Roti Ko
Lapka.

Yun Bar Bar Food Item Badla
Per Chooha Her Bar Khane Ki Taraf Bhaga.

Prof:
Bus
Sabit Hua K Bhook Hi Sab Se Bari Taqat Hai.

Last Row Se Ek Student Bola:

“Sir Ek Bar
Choohia B Badal K Dekh Lete” :-”)

TEACHER: Which Book Has Helped U Most In

TEACHER:
Which Book Has Helped U Most In Your Life..??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
STUDENT:
My Father’s Cheque Book ..;-)

Wife: Aap Bohat Mote Ho Gaye Ho,

Wife:
Aap Bohat Mote Ho Gaye Ho,

Sardar:
Tum Bhi To Kitni Moti Hogayi Ho,

Wife:
Buddhu Main To Maa Banne Wali Hoon,

Sardar:
Main Bhi To Baap Banne Wala Hoon.

Sardar Ko Har Bat Me “TERA BHAI”

Sardar Ko Har Bat Me “TERA BHAI”
Kehne Ki Aadat Thi.

Wo Shadi K Bad
Apne Bedroom Me Gaya Or
Dulhan Ka Ghoonghat Utha K Bola:

“Kesa Lag Raha Hay
TERA BHAI?”

Sardaar Ki BV Bhaag Gai

Sardaar Ki BV Bhaag Gai
3 Din Baad Wapis Aaye
Sardaar Ghusse Se Bola
“Hun Ki Lain Aayi Ain”

Sardarni:
“Mobile Da Charger Bhul Gai C”

1 Sardar Rail Ki Patri Pr So Gya

1 Sardar Rail Ki Patri Pr So Gya
1 Admi Ne Kaha Kia Kr Rhy Ho
Rail Ay Ge To Mr Jao Gy.

Sardar:
Mery Oper Se Jahaz Guzr Gya
To Kch Nai Hoa
Rail Kya Cheez Hai

Sardar: Mobile Me Kuch Mp3 Load Krna He

Sardar:
Mobile Me Kuch Mp3 Load Krna He

Servicing Man:
Memory Card He?

Sardar:
Nahi Kya Ration Card Chalega? =P

Sardar Ki Mah Ki Death Ho Gai,

Sardar Ki Mah Ki Death Ho Gai,

Ek Saal Bad Sardar Ka Baap America Sa Wapis Aya,
Us Na Poucha Teri Mah Kahan Ha,
Sardar Bola Wo To Pichlay Saal Hi Mar Gai Thi,
Sardar Ka Bap Ronay Lga Or Bola
Kuttay,Kaminay To Tu Na Mujhay Btaya Q Nhi,
Sardar Bola,

Me Na Socha Surprise Don Ga…;->

Sardar K Ghar Chor A Gya

Sardar K Ghar Chor A Gya
Sardar Ne Dekha To Chor Bhaga.

Sardar Bhagta Bhagta Chor Sy B Agay Nikal Gya.
.
.
.
Sardar:
Ek Tay Chori Utto Saday Naal Raisaan…?

Sardar With Dentist

Sardar With Dentist
Kia Dard K Bagar Daant Nikaal Lete Ho?

Doctor: Nahi

Sardar:
Mein Nikaal Leta Hon

Doctor:
Wo Kaise?

Sardar:
He
He He He

1 Sardar Jungle Se Guzar Rha Tha

1 Sardar Jungle Se Guzar Rha Tha
K Us Ne Daikha K
1 Sanp Drakht Par Latka Hua Hai…

Sardar:
NIDDO Piya Karo…
Sirf Latakne Se Height Nai Barhti;-)

1 Police Officer Bachey Se:

1 Police Officer Bachey Se:
Beta Kia Tumhare Abu
“Al Qaida” Me Hain?

Bacha:
Uncle! Mujhe Abu Ka To Pata Nahi Per Main
.
.
.
“Noorani Qaida” Pe Hoon!

Agar 1 Kashti Mai

Agar 1 Kashti Mai
Zardari
Ja Raha Ho
Aur Achanak!!
Kashti Doob Jaee
To Aap Kay Khayal
Mai Kaun Bach
Jaega
.
.
.
.
.
Mai Batahoo…
.
.
.
.
.
.
Bhutto
Ka
Khandan

Sardar: Ye Bacha Tmara Kia Lagta Hy?

Sardar:
Ye Bacha Tmara Kia Lagta Hy?

Pathan:
Ye Hmara Dooor Ka Sagga Bhai Hy

Srdar:
Dooor Ka.Saga Bhai?
Me Samja Nai

Pathan:
Is K Or Mere Drmiyan
13 Behen Bhai Hain

Sardar: Ye Bacha Tmara Kia Lagta Hy?

Sardar:
Ye Bacha Tmara Kia Lagta Hy?

Pathan:
Ye Hmara Dooor Ka Sagga Bhai Hy

Srdar:
Dooor Ka.Saga Bhai?
Me Samja Nai

Pathan:
Is K Or Mere Drmiyan
13 Behen Bhai Hain

Ek Pathan Hotel Mein

Ek Pathan Hotel Mein
Roasted Chicken Khanay K Baad Haddi Chaba Raha Tha,
Paas He Baitha Aik Sardar,
Daal Kha Raha Tha
Usne Pathan Se Tanziya Andaz Mein Pocha:

Khan!
Tumhary Illaqay Mein Kuttay Kia Khatay Hain?

Pathan:
‘Daal’

Moral:
Bach K!
Pathan B Point Mar Saktey Hain..!

1 Pathan HAJJ Pe Gaya,

1 Pathan HAJJ Pe Gaya,
Aur Zor Zor Se DUA Mangne Laga..

YA ALLAH MERE SAARE GUNAH MUAAF KAR DE
WARNA MERE
2,35,000
WAPAS Kar De

1 Pathan 2sre Se:

1 Pathan 2sre Se:
O Yara Humare Pait Me Gas Hy…!!!

2sra Pathan:
Khuda Ka Shukar Hy K
Petrol Nahi Hy Wrna
Amrica Qabza Kr Leta..!

Pathan: Aao Race Lagaty Hain

Pathan:
Aao Race Lagaty Hain
Jo Haara Wo Ek Hazar Rupe Dega

Sardar:
Lekin Mujhe Rasta Nahi Maloom

Pathan:
Bus Tum Meray Peechay Peechay Rehna

Sardar:
Thanks Yar

Pathan Tanki Saaf Karne Chatt Pe Gaya

Pathan Tanki Saaf Karne Chatt Pe Gaya
Tanki Per Qawwa Betha Tha
Pathan Jaldi Se Neeche Utra
Or Seerhi Hata K Bola:
Beta Mai To Utar Gaya
Tu Kese Ayega

1 Pathan Ne Shadi K Liye

1 Pathan Ne Shadi K Liye
1 Zaheen Larki Talash Ki…
Lekin Us Larki Ne Shadi Se Inkar Ker Diya…
.

.
Kyon…?

.

.

Kyon K Wo Waqai Zaheen Thi…

Pathan Ko Ladies Garments Shop Mein

Pathan Ko Ladies Garments Shop Mein
Salesman Ki Nokri Mili.

Aik Larki Aayi Aur Kaha:
Underwear Dikhao.

Pathan
(Sharmate Hue):
Baaji !
Aaj Nahi Pehna..

1 Truck Dusry Truck Ko

1 Truck Dusry Truck Ko
Rasi Se Bandh Kr Leja Rha Tha
Ye Dekh Kr Ek Pathan Has-Has Kr Lotpot Hogya

Or Kehny Laga:
Ek Rassi Ko Le Jany K Liye
Do Do Truck

Mom: Beta Khana Khayega?

Mom:
Beta Khana Khayega?

Beta:
Na

Mom:
Ladu Khaiyega??

Beta:
Na

Mom:
Ice Cream Khaiyega?

Beta:
Na

Mom:
Baap Pe Gaya Hai
THAPPAD Hi Khayega

Beta: Apni Maa Se Purani Album Dekhte Hue

Beta:
Apni Maa Se Purani Album Dekhte Hue
Maa Ye Photo Me Smart Admi Kaun Hai?

Maa:
Beta Ye Tumhare Papa Hai

Beta:
To Hum Iss Ganje K Sath Kyo Rehte Hai ?

Son: Mai School Nahi Jaonga

Son:
Mai School Nahi Jaonga

Mom:
Kyun?

Son:
Naukri Kron Ga

Mom:
4TH Class Parhkar Kya Kaam Karoge?

Son:
3rd Class Ki Larkiyon Ko Tution Parhaonga

Sunny Ki Amni:

Sunny Ki Amni:
Beta Jo Bacha Baron Ko Salam Nahi Kare Ga
Wo Jahannam Me Jae Ga.

Suny:
Phir To Abbo B Jahannam Me Jae Ge

Ami:
Wo Q Beta

Suny:
Q K Abbo Ne Nana Abbo Ko Salam Nahi Kia

Son: Mama Kehte He Jo Cheze

Son:
Mama Kehte He Jo Cheze
Buzurg Kre Unhe Follow Krna Chae

Mother:
Jee Beta

Son:
Tu Mama
Dada Jan Ahmed Ke Products Use Krte The
Hum B Krege

Father: Tumne Colege Me Sub Sy Muskil Kam Kon

Father:
Tumne Colege Me Sub Sy Muskil Kam Konsa Sikha

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
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.
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.
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.
Son:
Tez Andhi Me 1 Teeli Se 2
CIGERATE Jlana

Baap: Beta Is Br Exam

Baap:
Beta Is Br Exam
Main Tumny 9O% Lane Hain

Beta:
Nai Me To Is Bar 1OO% Laon Ga

Baap:
Kion Mazaq Kr Rhe Ho?

Beta:
Shoru Kis Ne Kia Tha?

Musharaf Murgion Say

Musharaf
Murgion Say
Agar Tum Sab Ney Kal 2,2 Anday Na Diay Tou Sab
Ko Kal Lal Masjid Ki Tarah Army
Sey Halal Karva Dounga
Subah Us Ne
Dekha Sab Ne 2 Anday Diye
Magar Ek Se Usey 1 Anda Mila..

Musharaf:
Tum Ne Ek Anda Q Dia?
Murg:
Janab Yeh B Army Ke Dar Ki Waja Se Dia Hai
Waisey Main Murgha Hoon

Jab Koi Aam Insan Marta Hai

Jab Koi Aam Insan Marta Hai
Tu Auski Kabar Par Likha Hota Hai

Akhri Aram Gah

Jab Musharaf Maray Ga
Tu Auski Kabar Pe Likha Hoo Ga

Akhri Harami Da

Sorry Musharaf Shab

Kiya Karu Public Demand Hai

Kahan Dhoondtay Phirto Ho Musharraf Ko Faraz

Kahan Dhoondtay Phirto Ho Musharraf Ko Faraz
Woh To Urr Gya Prickly Heat Powder Ki Tarah

Parliment House K Samnay

Parliment House K Samnay
Do Insaan Sir Jhukaye Insaaf Ki Talash Me Bethay Hain

Un Me Se Ek Musharaf Hai Dosra Kon Hoga?

“Faraz”

Parliament House Ke Samnay Do Insaan

Parliament House Ke Samnay Do Insaan
Sar Jhukaye Insaaf Ki Talash Main Bethay Hain..

Un Main Se Ek Musharaf Hai
Dosra Kon Hoga..??

:

:

:

“ FARAZ ”

Parvez Musharaf Ki Taraf Se

Parvez Musharaf Ki Taraf Se

Pakistani Qaum Ke Naam

Aakhri Paigham…
:
Khawateen-O-Hazraat..

:

:

:

“TUSI FARAZ NAAL CHANGI NAI KITTI”

Jinhone Kabhi Parhi Nahi Namaz-E-Jumma FARAZ

Jinhone Kabhi Parhi Nahi Namaz-E-Jumma FARAZZ
Wo Loog Musharraf K Istifay Par Nafil Par Rahay Thay

Aapko Khushian Itni Milain

Aapko Khushian Itni Milain
Jitni Musharraf Ko Galiyan

Aapki Zindagi Se Gham Aise Khatam Hon
Jese PTV Se Haya

Aap Ko GEO Jaisa
Sabar Milay

Shohrat Itni Milay Jitni
“BB” Ko Mili

Health Aisi Mile Jaisay
SANGEETA Ko

OR

Aapke Din Aise Phirain
Jaisay Zardari K!!!

Aaj Purani Rahoon Sey Koi Mujhe Awaz Na Dey

Aaj Purani Rahoon Sey Koi Mujhe Awaz Na Dey
Dard Mein Doobey Gheet Na Dey Ghum Ka Sisakta Saaz Na Dey
(Zardari)

Hum Chord Chaley Hein Mehfil Ko Yaad Aaye Kabhi To Mat Rona
(Nawaz Sharif)

Socha Tha Pyar Na Karein Ghey
Hum Na Rice Pe Marein Ghey

Mustafee Ho Gaya Yaro Mush

Mustafee Ho Gaya Yaro Mush
Na Kar Paya Kuch B Bush
Jan Chootey Hai Aik Aamar Sey
Kyun Na Hon Pakistani Khush

Girl To Molvi: Kia Mein Kisi Kanwarey Mard Se Kiss

Girl To Molvi:
Kia Mein Kisi Kanwarey Mard Se Kiss Ker Sakti Hoon

Molvi:
Astagfrullah

Girl:
Married Admi Se Kiss Ker Sakti Hoon

Molvi:
Naoozbillah

Girl:
Aap K Sath Kiss Ker Sakti Hoon

Molvi:
Bismillah

Ek Molvi Apne Wife Say:

Ek Molvi Apne Wife Say:
Jab Main Mar Jaoun Thu Samny Wali Ko Zarour Bulana

Wife:
Who Kion?

Molvi:
Who Murdy Se Lipt Lipt Kar Roti Hay

Aik Mulla Ke Shaadi Nahi Ho Rahi Thi

Aik Mulla Ke Shaadi Nahi Ho Rahi Thi
Wo Mannat Mangne Gaya
Waha Us K Maan Gum Gaye

Mulla Bola Ya Khuda Tere Khudai
Apni Te Labbi Ni Abbay De Ve Gawai

Muslim Lady :

Muslim Lady :
Assalam-O-Laiakum

Molvi:
Ye Jannat Main Jayegi

Hindu Lady:
Namaste

Molvi:
Ye Dozakh Main Jayegi

Christian Lady:
Hi Daling

Molvi:
Ye Mere Sath Jayegi

Boyz 2 Qari Sahib:

Boyz 2 Qari Sahib:
Qari Sahab Kiya Ladkioon K Sath
Sona Gunah Hai?

Qari Sahab:
Gunah Tu Nae
Likin Tun Log Sote Hi Tu Nhi Ho

Ek Molvi Ek Aurat Se Takra Gaya:

Ek Molvi Ek Aurat Se Takra Gaya:

Aurat Ghussay Se:
Aapko Sharm Nhi Aati
Daarhi Rkh Kr Takkar Maar Rahy Hain

Molvi:
Mohtarma
Ye Daarhi Hy Break Nahi!

Memon: Yeh Kaila(Banana) Kaisay Diya?

Memon:
Yeh Kaila(Banana) Kaisay Diya?

Shopkeeper:
1rs.

Memon:
60 Paisa Ka Deta Hai?

S.K:
60 Paise Mein To Sirf Chilka Milega.

Memon:
Ley 40 Paisay
Chilka Rakh Aur Kela Day De

Teacher: Jo Ander Aane K Liye Sab Se Chota

Teacher:
Jo Ander Aane K Liye Sab Se Chota
Sentence Bole Ga
Ussey Gift Mile Ga

Eng Child:
May I Come In?

Urdu Child:
Mai Andr A Skta Ho?

Memon:
Achivina

Memon At Petrol Pump:

Memon At Petrol Pump:
Bhai 1rs Ka Petrol Dal Do.

Salesman:
Bhai Itna Sara Petrol
Dalva K Kahan Jana Hai?

Memon:
Jana Kahan Hai
Hm To Aise Hi Paise Urate Hen…

Memon Ko Current Laga…

Memon Ko Current Laga…

Begum Ne Memon Se Poocha:
Kuch Howa To Nahi..?

Memon Bola:
Mujhe Chorr
Bahir Jaa Kar Deakh
“UNIT” Kitne Gire Hai.

1 Memon Hajj Per Gaya

1 Memon Hajj Per Gaya
Or Zor Zor Se DUA Mangne Laga

Ya Allah
Mere Saray Gunah Maaf Karday
Warna Mera
2 Lac Wapas Kar De

Memon Ki Bv Bimar Thi

Memon Ki Bv Bimar Thi
Light Na Hone Ki Waja Se
Usne Candle Jala Di Or Bola:
Doc Ko Lene Jarha Hun
Agar Tumhe Lage K Tum Nahi Bachogi To Plz
Candle Bujha Dena..

1 Memon Kangal Ho Gya

1 Memon Kangal Ho Gya
To Usne Apni BV Se Kaha:
Bchon Ko Unki Nani K Ghr Bhej Do
Or Tum Apni Ma K Ghar Chali Jao
Mera Allah Malik
He Me Apny Susral Chala Jata Hun.

Memon: Pent Ki Silai Kitni Hy?

Memon:
Pent Ki Silai Kitni Hy?

Tailor:
Rs. 150.

Memon:
Nekar Ki?

Tailar:
Rs. 50.

Memon: Ok.
Nikar Hi See De
Par Lmbai Pairon Tk Rkhna……

Jo Humesa Hasta Rehta Ha Usko

Jo Humesa Hasta Rehta Ha Usko HUS+MUKH Kehte Hai
Par
Jiska Hasna Humesha Kliye Band Ho Gya Ho Use Kya
Kahenge?

?

Got

No?
HUS BAND

Aik Aadmi Ki Biwi Sey Sawal Kia Geya

Aik Aadmi Ki Biwi Sey Sawal Kia Geya
Key Aapko Konsi Book Sab Sey Ziada Pasand Hai?

Biwi:
Apney Husband Ki Cheque Book….

Jo Humesa Hasta Rehta Ha Usko HUS+MUKH Keh

Jo Humesa Hasta Rehta Ha Usko HUS+MUKH Kehte Hai
Par
Jiska Hasna Humesha Kliye Band Ho Gya Ho Use Kya
Kahenge?

?

Got

No?
HUS BAND

Aik Aadmi Ki Biwi Sey Sawal Kia Geya

Aik Aadmi Ki Biwi Sey Sawal Kia Geya
Key Aapko Konsi Book Sab Sey Ziada Pasand Hai?

Biwi:
Apney Husband Ki Cheque Book….

1 Pakistani Dosray Say:

1 Pakistani Dosray Say:
Yar Kehtay Hain Iss Bar
Jung Computer Say Lari Jai Gi?

2nd:
Haan Misile Computer Say Control Hotay Hain Na ?

1st:
Phir To Hum Jung Haar Jain Gay

2nd:
Wo Kaisay?

1st:
Yar Agr Misile Chalanay Say Pahlay He
Bijli Chali Gayi To?

Ek Aadmi Raat Ko 3 Baje Utha Or

Ek Aadmi Raat Ko 3 Baje Utha Or
Tahajjud Parhne K Bad Dua Magte Waqt Bola:

Mere Mola Sab Sorahe Hen Or
Men Teri Ibadat Kar Raha Hoon

To Saath Wali Charpai Se Awaaz Aai:
Batameez Tu Apni Dua Maang
Hamari Q Shikayat Kar Raha He

Chor 1 Ghar Mein Chori Karne Gaya

Chor 1 Ghar Mein Chori Karne Gaya

Tijori Par Likha Tha:
TIJORI KO TORNE KI ZARURAT NAHI
440 No
LAGAO AUR SAMNE
WALA LAAL BUTTON DABAO
TIJORI KHUL JAYEGI.

Jaise Hi Button Dabaya
Alarm Bja
Aur POLICE Aagai

Jate Waqt CHOR Malik Se
Bola:
Aaj Mera INSANIYAT SE Aetbaar UTTH GAYA

1)Musharraf K Isteefay Pr Sochta Hoon Faraz !

1)Musharraf K
Isteefay Pr Sochta
Hoon Faraz !
Woh To Hushboo Hai Hawaon Main
Bikhar Jae Ga
Masla Tou MULK Ka Hai
Jisay Ab Zardari Nigal
Jaey Ga.

2). 1 Sardaar Ko TELENOR Mein Operator Ki Job
Mil Gai,
Pehli Hi Din
Call Aei,
“Sir ! Meri TELENOR ” Ki Sim
Block Ho Gai Hai”
Sardaar ! Te Saaleya Tu
U FONE Di Sim Le La.

3). Indian To Pakistani ,
Hamary Pass Shahrukh ,
Amir ,Salman ,Akshay ,Amitabh, Hy
Tumhare Pass Kia Hai?
Pakistani !
Hamare Pass Faraz Hai………

4). Mujay Us Shahs Se Bohat Pyar Hai FARAZ,
Jo Masjid Mei Kehta Hai
Rozay Walio Roza
Khol Lo.

5). MY Last Wish !
Mujay Jla Dena,
Ya Dfna Dena,
Par Marty Waqt 2 Ghoont
Beer Pila Dena,
Mai Taj Mahal
Nahi Mangta Yaro Bas
Meri Qabar Par

Girls Hostel Bana Dena.
6). Girlz Aur Universities
Mein Aik Fact
Common Hai?,
?
?
?
?
?
Apply Har Taraf Krna Chahiye
………Kahee Na Kahee
Chance Ban He Jaata Hai….

Shohar Apni Bv Ko Dafna K Ghar

Shohar Apni Bv Ko Dafna K Ghar
Aya He Tha
K
Achank Zor Se Bijli Chamki
Or
Tufani Barish Shuru Ho Gai,
Shohar Ne Asman Ko Dekha Or Bola!

Lagta Hai Pohnch Gai…

Wife Or Husband Market Ja Re Thay

Wife Or Husband Market Ja Re Thay
To Ik Faqeer Ne Kaha:

“Shehzadi 5 Rupay Dede, Andha
Hoon”

Husband:
Dedo,
Tumhe Shehzadi Keh Raha Hai
To Zaroor Andha Hoga.

Husband Wife Ki Larai Ho Rahi Thi

Husband Wife Ki Larai Ho Rahi Thi
Unka Chota Bacha Bhe Wahan Betha Tha.

Husband:
Tu Sali Kutti.

Wife:
Tu Sala Kutta

Bacha Masumiat Se Bola
Or Main Sala Puppy.

Bv: Ap Nay Pichlay Sal Eid Par

Bv:
Ap Nay Pichlay Sal Eid Par
Meri Ami Ko Lohay Ki Kursi Di The

Is Saal Kia Irada Ha

Shohar:
Is Saal Us Main
Current Chornay Ka Irada Ha

1st: Biwi Se Larai Khatam Howi?

1st:
Biwi Se Larai Khatam Howi?

2nd:
Ghutney Taik K Mere Pass Ai Thi

1st:
Usne Ghutne Taik K Kya Kaha?

2nd:
Yahi K Bed Ke Niche Se
Niak Ao Kuch Nai Kahongi

Wife: Jab Mei Gaana Gati Hon

Wife:
Jab Mei Gaana Gati Hon
Toh Aap Balcony Mei Kyoun Chaley Jatey Hain?

Husband:
Ta K Kahin Muhaley Waley Yeh Na Samjhein
K Me Tumhara Gala Daba Raha Hon.

Wife: Aaj Mere Tann, Mann Ma Aag Laga Dain

Wife:
Aaj Mere Tann, Mann Ma Aag Laga Dain

Hsband Ne Petrol Phenk K Aag Laga Di

Moral:
Jazbat Ka Izhar
Aasan Alfaz Ma
Krein’

Sponsered By P R L …..!!

Aik Bacha Apni Maa Se

Aik Bacha Apni Maa Se

Mama Abbu Aaj Kaam Wali Aunti Ko
Bed Pe Lita Kar…

Maa Ne Kaha Bus
Baqi Apne Abbu Ke Saamne Bolna

Jab Abbu Aaye To Maa Ne Kaha Ab Batao Beta

Bacha Bola:
Mama , Papa Kaam Wali Aunti Ko
Bed Pe Leta Kar Wohi Kar Rahe Thay
Jo Ooper Walay Uncle
Aap Ke Sath Kartey Hain

Shohar: Hum Dono Jannati Hai,

Shohar:
Hum Dono Jannati Hai,

Bivi:
Kesy?

Shohar:
Tum Mujhe Dekh Kar Shukar Ada Krti
Ho
Or
M Tumhay Dek Kar Toba Krta Ho.

1 Makrani Bohat Der Se

1 Makrani Bohat Der Se
Ek Haseen Larki Ko Ghoor Rha Tha,

LARKI:
Kya Dekh Rahe Ho?

Makrani:
Hum Soch Raha Tha
K Agr Tum Hamara Maa Hota
To Hum B Khubsurat Hota.

Mehboob Aap Ke Qadmon Mien”

Mehboob Aap Ke Qadmon Mien”

Agar Aap Ko Apni “Girl Frnd” K Past Or Future K Bare Main
Jan’na Hai Tu Apni Gal Frnd Ka Number Mukamal
Naam Or Pate K Sath Is No. Par Send Karen,
+92-0334-9136162
“Haq Baba, Sach Baba”
Zarori Note:-
“Baba G Ka Number Change Karna Bohat
Bari Beghairiti Hai”
Shukriya.

Doctor: Aap Ka Weight Kitna Hai?

Doctor:
Aap Ka Weight Kitna Hai?

Santa:
Chashme(Opticals) K Saath 75kg

Doctor:
Aur Chasme K Bina!

Santa:
Vo Muje Dikhta Hi Nahi

Doctor Mariz Se :

Doctor Mariz Se :
Ager Tum Meri Duwa Se Theek Ho Gaye To Mujhe
Kya Enaam Do Gay
Mariz:
May Qabrey Khodta Hun
Aap Ki Qaber Free Khod Dun Ga

Usse Dekh Kar Do Doctor Aapas May

Usse Dekh Kar Do Doctor Aapas May
Jhagar Tean Hay
Aik Kehta Hay K Us Ki Haddi Toot Gai Hai
Dosra Bolta Hai K
Nahi Us Ka Angotha Nikal Gaya Hai
Donoon Me Kafi Behas Ho Rahi Hoti Hai To
Tisra Doctor Bolta Hai
Chalo Us Say Hi Poch Laetey Hain
Ussay Poch Tay Hain To
Wo Bolata Hai
Nahi , Na Mera To Chapl Tota Hay

Man: Koi Lambi Umar Ka Tariqa Bataiye

Man:
Koi Lambi Umar Ka Tariqa Bataiye

Doctor:
Shadi Karlo

Man:
Kiya Is Se Umar Lambi Ho Jayegi

Doctor:
Nahi, Ye Shouq Khatam Ho Jayega!!

Ek Doctor Ki Nurse Se Ho Shadi Hogai

Ek Doctor Ki Nurse Se Ho Shadi Hogai
Dost Ne Doctor Se Poocha:
Suna Yar, Kesi Life Chal Rahi Hai?

Doctor:
Yar Kya Kahoon Jab Tak Sister Na Kaho
Sunti Hi Nahi Hai

Mareez Ney Achank Aankhen Kholty Huy Kaha:

Mareez Ney Achank Aankhen Kholty Huy Kaha:

Doctor Sahib
Kia Mera Operatn Kamyab Raha?

Sabr Say Kam Lo Beta…

Main Doctor Ni..
FARISHTA Hon…

Doctar Pagal Se Tum Pagal Kaisy Huway

Doctar Pagal Se
Tum Pagal Kaisy Huway

Pagal:
Main Ne 1 Bewa Se Shaadi Ki
Uski Jawan Beti Se Mere Baap Ne Shaadi Kar Li
Youn Meri Wo Beti Meri Maa Ban Gae
Un K Ghar Beti Hui To Wo Meri Behn Hoi
Magr Main Uski Naani Ka Shohar Tha Is Liye Wo Meri Nawasi B Hui
Isi Tarha Mera Beta Apni Daadi Ka Bhai Ban Gaya

Balochi: Humare Raigistan Ma

Balochi:
Humare Raigistan Ma
“Khush-Amdeed” Bolo To Vapis Awaz Aati Ha
“Amded Amded”

Pathan:
Humare Paharon Ma
“I Luv U” Bolo Tu Awaaz Aata Ha
“Luv U. Luv U”

Punjabi:
Ae Keri Gal Ae
Saaday Pind Vich Awaz Maro
“Teri Maa Di…”
Te Vapas Awaz Aandi Ae
“Teri Pehen Di”
“Teri Niki Di”
“Teri Waddi Di”….

1 Makrani Bohat Dair

1 Makrani Bohat Dair
Se 1 Haseen Larki Ko Ghoor Raha Tha

Larki:
Kya Dekh Rahe Ho

Makrani:
Hum Soch Raha Tha Ke Agar Tum Hamara Maa Hota To
Hum Bhi Khoobsurat Hota

on Ne Ab Jurm Ki Dunya Chor Di Hai

on Ne Ab Jurm Ki Dunya Chor Di Hai
Ab Aik Madrassa Banaya Hai
So Plz
Balance Ki Surat
My Don Ko Chanda Day Kar Apni Aakhrat Sawarain

Ap Ka Khadim
Haji Don

Malik Nokar Se:

Malik Nokar Se:
Tum Andar Kion Aaiy?

Tumhain Nahi Pata Tha
K Main Naha Raha Hon?

Nokar:
Maaf Karna Sahab,
Main Samjha Tha Malkin Hain.

Ek Bacha Bench Per Betha

Ek Bacha Bench Per Betha
Ek K Baad Ek Toffee Kha Raha Tha
Ek Admi Ne Dekha

To Bola:
Jo Log Ziada Meetha Khate Hain
Un Ka Jaldi Iniqal Ho Jata Hai

Bacha:
Mere Dada Ki Umar 106 Saal Thi

Admi:
Wo Meetha Kam Khate Honge?
Hai Na

Bahca:
Nahi
Wo Apne Kam Se Kam Rakhte The

“Aj Kay Bachay”

“Aj Kay Bachay”

Camera Man Studio Mei Chotay Bachay Se:
Meri Traf Deko Beta
Es Camere Se Kabootar Niklega

Bacha:
Focus Adjust Kar Beta
Jahalat Ki Batain Na Kar

::ARZ KIYA HAI::

::ARZ KIYA HAI::

Mathay Par Lahu Sir Par Reit

Wah Wah !

Mathay Par Lahu Sir Pr Reit

Kyun Ke Larki Ne Phool Mara Gamlay
Samait

Wah
Wah
Wah

Boy 1: Yar Larki Ko

Boy 1:
Yar Larki Ko
“I Love U” Kehne Ki
Sabse Achi Jaga Kon C He?

Boy 2:
Faisal Masjid.

Boy 1:
Q?

Boy 2:
Q K Wahan Larkian
Chappal K Bagair Aayi Hoti Hein.

Girl: Mujhe Ek Aisa Shohar Chahiye

Girl:
Mujhe Ek Aisa Shohar Chahiye
Jo Achi Achi Batein Kare
Hansi Mazaq Karey
Aur Raton Ko Mujhe Ganey Sunaye

Boy:
Tumhein Shohar Nahi FM Radio Chahiye

Girl: Ye Jo Samne Ladka Betha Hai Is Ka Naam

Girl:
Ye Jo Samne Ladka Betha Hai
Is Ka Naam Kya Hai

Waiter:
Yeh Ali Shahb Hain

Girl:
Yeh Mjhe Aik Ghantay Se Pareshan Kar Rahey Hain

Waiter:
Magar Wo To Apki Taraf Dekh Bhi Nahi Rahay?

Girl:
Yahi To Pareshani Hai

Moral:
Dunia Shareefon Ko Jeenay Nahi Deti

Boy: Tum Shadi Ke Baad

Boy:
Tum Shadi Ke Baad
Apne Liye Alag Ghar To Nahin Mango Gi

Girl:
Arey Nahin Main Aisi Larki Nahin Hoon
Tum Apni Amma Ko Alag Ghar Dila Dena

Ek Boy Girlfriend Se Milne Aya,

Ek Boy Girlfriend Se Milne Aya,
Wo Chai Bnane Chale Gai..

Girlfriend Ka Mobile Sofy Pr Dekh Kr
Boy Ne Socha K Mera Numbr
Kis
Naam Pr Save Kiya Ho Ga?

Dear, Sweet Ya
Janu..

Jub Us Ne Miss Bell Di
To Screen Py Aa Rha Tha K..

“Kutta No# 5″
Calling…

Boy: Tmra Nam Kya Hai?

Boy:
Tmra Nam Kya Hai?

Girl:
Q Btao?
Me Tme Janti B Nai..!

Boy:
Na Btao Me Knsa Tme Apni Ferari
Me Betha Ra Hun!

Girl:
NADIA, B.Com 2nd Yr
Wo Smne Wali Gali Me
Ryt Hand Pe 4th Nmbr Pe Mera
Ghr Hai 32/B,
Ghr Me Aik Chota Bhai N Ami Abu Hain,
Tution Tymings 6 To 8…:

Sardiyon Ki Sham Thi

Sardiyon Ki Sham Thi
Mene Us K Hath Pe Hath Rakha
To Wo Garam Thi
Maine Kaha Garam Hath
Wafa Ki Nishani Hai

Usne Hans Kar Kaha:
“Kaminay Bukhar Hai Mujhe”

Bhikari: Hello , Pizza Hut?

Bhikari:
Hello , Pizza Hut?

Pizza Hut:
Yes Sir

Bhikari:
1 Large Pizza Or 1 Litre Pepsi Bhej Do

Pizza Hut:
Sir Kis Ke Naam Se Bhejoon?

Bhikari:
Allah Ke Naam Pe Dede Baba!

TEACHER: Which Book Has Helped U Most In Yo

TEACHER:
Which Book Has Helped U Most In Your Life..??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
STUDENT:
My Father’s Cheque Book ..;-)

Kisi Ne Sardar Se Charpai Mangi.

Kisi Ne Sardar Se Charpai Mangi.

Sardar:
Humare Pass Sirf 2 Hein,
Aik Pe Maa Aur Patni Sote Hein,

Aur Dusri Pe Mein Aur Abba…

Admi:
Yar Charpai Na Do,
Tarteeb Se To Soya Karo….

Aik Bacha Apni Maa Se

Aik Bacha Apni Maa Se

Mama Abbu Aaj Kaam Wali Aunti Ko
Bed Pe Lita Kar…

Maa Ne Kaha Bus
Baqi Apne Abbu Ke Saamne Bolna

Jab Abbu Aaye To Maa Ne Kaha Ab Batao Beta

Bacha Bola:
Mama , Papa Kaam Wali Aunti Ko
Bed Pe Leta Kar Wohi Kar Rahe Thay
Jo Ooper Walay Uncle
Aap Ke Sath Kartey Hain

1 Shohar Khubsurat Tha Or BV Kali Thi,

1 Shohar Khubsurat Tha Or BV Kali Thi,

Shohar:
Hum Dono Jannati Hai,

Bivi:
Kesy?

Shohar:
Tum Mujhe Dekh Kar Shukar Ada Krti
Ho
Or
M Tumhay Dek Kar Toba Krta Ho.

1 Pathan Ne Shadi K Liye

1 Pathan Ne Shadi K Liye
1 Zaheen Larki Talash Ki…
Lekin Us Larki Ne Shadi Se Inkar Ker Diya…
.

.
Kyon…?

.

.

Kyon K Wo Waqai Zaheen Thi…

1 Sardar Jungle Se Guzar Rha Tha

1 Sardar Jungle Se Guzar Rha Tha
K Us Ne Daikha K
1 Sanp Drakht Par Latka Hua Hai…

Sardar:
NIDDO Piya Karo…
Sirf Latakne Se Height Nai Barhti;-)

Pathan Ko Ladies Garments Shop Mein

Pathan Ko Ladies Garments Shop Mein
Salesman Ki Nokri Mili.

Aik Larki Aayi Aur Kaha:
Underwear Dikhao.

Pathan
(Sharmate Hue):
Baaji !
Aaj Nahi Pehna..

Sardiyon Ki Sham Thi

Sardiyon Ki Sham Thi
Mene Us K Hath Pe Hath Rakha
To Wo Garam Thi
Maine Kaha Garam Hath
Wafa Ki Nishani Hai

Usne Hans Kar Kaha:
“Kaminay Bukhar Hai Mujhe”

1 Truck Dusry Truck Ko

1 Truck Dusry Truck Ko
Rasi Se Bandh Kr Leja Rha Tha
Ye Dekh Kr Ek Pathan Has-Has Kr Lotpot Hogya

Or Kehny Laga:
Ek Rassi Ko Le Jany K Liye
Do Do Truck

Baap: Beta Is Br Exam

Baap:
Beta Is Br Exam
Main Tumny 9O% Lane Hain

Beta:
Nai Me To Is Bar 1OO% Laon Ga

Baap:
Kion Mazaq Kr Rhe Ho?

Beta:
Shoru Kis Ne Kia Tha?

Kutta Maar Giya Razai Vich

A Sardar Jee Proposed A Girl With A Romantic Poetry:

Kutta Maar Giya Razai Vich
Main Pagal Aan Teri Judaee Vich
Pani Tay Machhar Beh Nai Sakda
Sardar Teray Bin Reh Nai Sakda

Jindgi Ch Jittan Da Shaunk C Rakhde

Jindgi Ch Jittan Da Shaunk C Rakhde
Par Tere To Haarn Pichhe V Koi Majburi C
Shart Hundi Tan Sabb Kuj Var K V Jitt Lende
Par Tere Jittan Layi Meri Haar Jar Uri C

TOHFA’ Tuhanu Eh Greeb Ki De Sakda

TOHFA’ Tuhanu Eh Greeb Ki De Sakda
Bus De K Duavan Hi Saar Deve
Eho Ardaas Meri Rabb Age
Sohni Jindgi, Kothi Te Tainu Car Deve
Ho Jave Je An-Ban Kite Teri Meri
Tainu Jitt Te Mainu Oh Haar Deve
Rabb Na Kare J Muk Jan Saah Tere
Tainu Bakhash K Jindgi Mainu Maar Deve

1 Patahn Ki Maut Bijli Girne Se Hui

1 Patahn Ki Maut Bijli Girne Se Hui
Per Uski Laash Muskuraty Hue Mili
Farishte Ne Pucha Aisa Kyon?

Pathan Bola :
Hum Ko Laga K Koi Photo Khench Raha Hai

1 Pathan Apne Kandhey Pe

1 Pathan Apne Kandhey Pe
Tota Bithaey Ja Raha Tha

1 Admi Ne Pucha:
Ye Konsa Janwar Hai?

Tota Bola:
Pathan Hai Sala…

1 Admi Ka Tota(Parrot)

1 Admi Ka Tota(Parrot)
Daily 1 Shaks Ko
“Oye Baghairt”
Kaha Karta Tha
Us Shaks Ne Admi Se Shikayat Ki
Admi Ne Tote Ko Danta
Agle Din Jab Wo Shakhs Qareb Se Guzra To Tota Kuch Na Bola
Thora Aage Ja Ke Us Shakhs Ne Peeche Mur Ke Dekha To Tota Hjanste Howe
Bola
Samajh To Gaya Hoga Tu

Macher Ne 1 Admi Ko Din Main Kata

Macher Ne 1 Admi Ko Din Main Kata
Admi Ne Kaha Tum To Rat Main Kat Tay Hona?
Macher Bola
Ghar K Halat Kharab Hain
Ovr Time Ker Raha Hun