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Sunday, December 23, 2012

Bhikhari: Saab 1 rupaya de do.

Bhikhari: Saab 1 rupaya de do.

Saheb: Kal aana. Kal

Bhikhari: Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar mein is colony mein mere lakhon rupaye fase huye hain.

Boyfriend to Girlfriend: Darling main

Boyfriend to Girlfriend: Darling main tumse shaadi nahi kar sakta gharwale mana karrahe hai.


Girlfriend: Tumhare ghar mein kaun kaun hai?

Boyfriend: Ek biwi aur 3 bacche…

Mohan: Sohan, dekho yeh murde kitne

Mohan: Sohan, dekho yeh murde kitne aaraam se apni kabron mein sote hai.


Sare murde uth khare hue aur bole: Kyun na soye, yeh jaga apni jaan de ke hasil kee hai..!

One: Oye tera ek daant neela kyun ho gaya?

One: Oye tera ek daant neela kyun ho gaya?

Two: Yaar maine ink lagayi hai

.


One: Woh kyun.?

Two: Kyun ke aaj kal “bluetooth” ka zamana hai yaar…

Wife: Woh admi jo drink kar raha hai,

Wife: Woh admi jo drink kar raha hai, Usko maine 10 saal pehle shadi ke liye inkaar kia tha. Dekho who aaj tak sharab pee raha hai!


Husband: Wow! itni lambi celebration!

Ek aadmi apne dost ki kabar par

Ek aadmi apne dost ki kabar par phool daal raha hota hai.

Aur samne wale kabar mein bhi, ek aadmi apne dost ki kabar par chawal daal raha hota hai.


Pehla aadmi doosre se kehta hai, “Ye tumhara dost phool sunghne kab uthega?”

Doosra aadmi
, “Jab tumhara dost chawal khane uthe ga.”

Santa: Yaar aaj pehli bar maine accha


Santa: Yaar aaj pehli bar maine accha kaam kya, jiss par logon ne mujhe bohat mara!

Banta: Woh kya..

Santa: Ek makan mein aag lagi thi, aur andar kuch log thay, maine window tori aur andar ja kar sab logon ko bahar nikal diya.


Banta: Toh logon ne kyun mara

Santa: Yaar, kyun ke woh sab log fire fighter thay!

Wife: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye thay.

Wife: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye thay.


Husband: Kya bataoon, sab galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Pandit : Tumhare jeevan mein 6 ladkiya aayengi.

Pandit : Tumhare jeevan mein 6 ladkiya aayengi.

Thambu : Wow, kya baat hai.

pandit.jpg

Pandit: Zyada khush honey ki baat nahi hai. Ek gharwali aur 5 betiya hai..

Gabbar : Kitne admi they?

Gabbar : Kitne admi they?
Sambha : Sardar 2

Gabbar : Mujhe ginti nahin aati, 2 kitne hote hain?
Samba : Sardar 2, 1 ke baad aata hai


Gabbar : Aur 2 ke pehle?
Samba : 2 k pehle 1 aata hai.

Gabbar : To beech mein kaun ata hai?
Samba : Beech mein koi nahi aata