Santa: Main ek baar jungle mein susu

Santa: Main ek baar jungle mein susu karne gaya toh waha per Sher tha.

Banta: Phir kya hua?

Santa: Maine Sher se kaha, “Pehle tum karlo, mera toh ho gaya hai.”

Saas: Khuda ne tumhe do aankhe di hai,

Saas: Khuda ne tumhe do aankhe di hai, Chawal se patthar nahi nikal sakti kya?

Bahu: Khuda ne tumhe battis daant diye hai do char 2-4 patthar nahi chabba sakti kya!!!

Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.

Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.

Santa: Tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi ho,

Wife: Main toh maa banne wali hoon!

Santa: Main bhi toh baap banne wala hoon.

Ek bar ek ladka samosa ke bich ke aalu

Ek bar ek ladka samosa ke bich ke aalu ko kha raha tha aur bahar ke hisse ko phek raha tha.

Dushra dost usse poochta hai ke tum samose ke sirf aalu ko kyun kha rahe hoo?

Pehla: Doctor ne mujhe bahar ke chejo ko khane se mana kiya hai.

Ek police Inspector ke ghar chori ho rahi thi.

Ek police Inspector ke ghar chori ho rahi thi.

Wife: Utho ji, ghar mein chori ho rahi hai.

Police Inspector: Mujhe sone de, main iss time duty par nahi hoon.

Policeman: “Tumne bich road pe bus Kyun rok di?”

Policeman: “Tumne bich road pe bus Kyun rok di?”

Pathan: Hum seher mein naya aaya hai magar Kanoon nahi torta! Woh samne dekho likha hai “Bus Stop” Toh humne rok diya :p

Phone ki ganti baji.

Phone ki ganti baji.
Santa : Phone mere liye ho toh kehna mein ghar pe nahi hoon.
Jasmeet : Wo ghar pe hain.

Santa : Maine mana kiya tha ke…
Jasmeet : Phone mere liye tha!

Shaadi ke doosre din beti apni

Shaadi ke doosre din beti apni maa se: Meri unse ladai ho gayi!

Maa: Shadi mein jhagde toh hote rehte hai fikar mat karo.

Beti: Woh toh thik hai par ab “LAASH” ka kya karu?

Bania’s son: Daddy meri door ki nazar

Bania’s son: Daddy meri door ki nazar kharab hai SPECKS banwa do.

Kanjoos Bania took him outside & said: Woh dekh kya hai?

Son: Suraj

Kanjoos Bania: Abbe ullu ke patthe, aur kitni dur tak dekhna chahe hai tu.

Ek gora aadmi tha. Jab uska ladka paida

Ek gora aadmi tha. Jab uska ladka paida hua toh woh kala tha.

Tabhi woh apni patni ke paas jata hai aur poochta hai, “Yaar main bhi gora tha tum bhi gori thi to bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya”

Aur phir uski biwi ne jawab diya, “Darling main bhi hot tum bhi hot sayad bachcha jal gaya hoga.”

k samay do bahut milne wale dost rahte thay.

k samay do bahut milne wale dost rahte thay. Lekin ek din ek dost ka maut ho gaya aur police investigate karne ke liye aaya aur uske dost ko sawal poochne laga…

Police: “Tumhara dost kaise mara?”

Sardar: “Pata nahi sahab, woh bola mere pet mein chuhe kud rahe hai toh maine usko chuha marne ki dawa khila di.”

Bush: Tujhe swimming aati hai?

Bush: Tujhe swimming aati hai?
Laaloo: No!

Bush:Tere se kutta acha hai jo swim kar leta hai.
Laaloo: Tujhe aati hai?

Bush:Haan!
Laaloo: Fir tere mein aur kutte mein kya farak hai…

Laloo to his P.A.: Itne khiladi kyun

Laloo to his P.A.: Itne khiladi kyun football ko laat maar rahe hai?

P.A.: Goal kar ne k liye.

Laloo: Susra, ball toh pahle se hi gol hai aur kitna gol karenge!