Sagai Hui... Shadi Hui...

Sagai Hui... Shadi Hui...
Biwi Ghar Mein Aayi...
Ghar Swarg Ban Gaya...
Aur main "Swargwasi"...

Hum ne zindagi ki shuruaaat 'S' se ki.

Hum ne zindagi ki shuruaaat 'S' se ki.
S se Suraj, S se Subah, S se Swagat, S se saaz, S se Sangeet.
Par Fir 'S' se Samay ne aisi karwat badli Ki 'S' se hamari Shadi ho gai.
Aur fir jeevan ka arth 'S' se Saans,
Sasural, Sala, Sali, Sasur aur 'Sankat' ho gaya.

Shadi ke pehle maine pyar kiya.

Shadi ke pehle maine pyar kiya.
Shadi ke baad ye maine kya kiya?
Shadi ke pehle Dil to Pagal Hai.
Shadi ke baad dil to pahal tha!v

Biwi vo hoti hai jo,

Biwi vo hoti hai jo,
Shaadi ke baad apne pati baad apne
pati kisari aadadto
kobadal deti hai,
aur baad me kehti hai ki,
"aap pehle jaise nahi rahe".

Wife ko begum kyon kehte hai?

Wife ko begum kyon kehte hai?
Ans: Kyonki shadi ke baad sare gum to husband
se hisse mein aate hai,
aur biwi Be-Gum ho jai Hai!!!

Ek aadmi apne aap me kehta hu

Ek aadmi apne aap me kehta hu ja raha tha ki aisi zindagi se toh maut aachi.
Achanak Yamdoot aa gaya aur bola “Tumhari jaan lene ka hukm hai”
Aadmi : Lo batao, aab insaan mazaak bhi nahi kar sakta hai kya?

santa &banta

Santa Banta se bola “Bhai aaj to chay peene ka maza aa gaya.”
Banta : Santa Jee, agar billi ne dudh me muh na mara hota to aur bhi
maza aata!!!

Wife to Husband : Meri to koi aulad nahi hai isliye

Wife to Husband : Meri to koi aulad nahi hai isliye
sochti hu ki apni saari jaydad kisi sadhu ko daan kar dungi

Yeh sunkar pati uthkar jane laga

Patni : Tum kaha ja rahe ho?
Pati : Sadhu ban-ne

Raat ke 3 baje santa ke number par phone

Raat ke 3 baje santa ke number par phone
aaya – Hello yaha Fatima Mehfooz rehti hai kya?
Santa : Kutte itni raat ko Fatima mere paas
hoti to mehfooz rehti kya?

santa & banta

Santa : Aaj papa ne pitayi kar di
Banta : Kyun?
Santa : Meine to sirf itna pucha “KAMINE” film
dekhne chal rahe ho ya ghar pe hi “BLUE” film dekhoge

Ek Ladki ne hoto par “India” ke tirange ka

Ek Ladki ne hoto par “India” ke tirange ka
rang laga rakha tha Ek ladka aaya aur hoto
par “kiss” kar gaya aur bola, “I LOVE MY INDIA”

Santa pland land hote hi chillane

Santa pland land hote hi chillane laga “Bangalore
aaya Bangalore aaya. Balle Balle”
Air Hostess : Hello sir, B silent.
Santa : “Ok, anglore aaya anglore aaya. Alle Alle”

Nepali : Saab ye shaam singh ka mobile

Nepali : Saab ye shaam singh ka mobile kaha milega
Salesman : Pata nahi
Nepali : Saab ji TV me ad to isi dukan ka hai.
Salesman : Abey ye sham singh nahi, SAMSUNG hai!!

Girls of 1995 – “Agar tum mil jao

Girls of 1995 – “Agar tum mil jao zamana chor denge hum”
Girls of 2010 – “Agra tum mil jao purana chor denge hum!”